Duties

Last night our FHE lesson was on strengthening our families. We had the Powers over, and after a brief lesson, we made family chains. Paper chains, mind you! Each person had four strips of cardstock, and we wrote or drew things we could do to make our families stronger. Then we created the aforementioned family chain with all of our contributions - for example, Annie's "Be nis" and Graham's "Go to the temple" with a knight drawn on the spire.

One of my strips read, "Continue to teach my children to work (patiently)," and this is one of my most important goals ... because teaching them to work is hard work. It takes more time and effort than doing it myself, as we all know, but the end result is worth it. Or should be worth it. I've seen that played out several times. Still, I have to remind myself of those end results when we're working together.

The whole morning had been work time, actually. Perhaps that's why I had work instruction on the brain later on. I made a list of jobs for everyone to do (Annie loves those lists & loves being able to cross off completed tasks!), including sweeping the front porch, carrying our air mattresses to the garage and putting them away, making beds, putting away laundry, picking up crayons ... the usual kid chore list. They managed to get the jobs done, though one thing I've noticed about Graham & Annie is that when I ask them to work, they play together beautifully! So beautifully that I don't like to interrupt them. Ha - good strategy, kids.

Actually, it isn't a strategy. It seems instead to be an example of one of the maxims I'm always spouting off, which is, work makes us appreciate leisure. (I also tell them, when they're "bored," that bored children need more work to do. Not a threat. More like truth. Work is a tonic for boredom.)

So they do a job, then play with toys. I remind them that the jobs are not done, and they slowly return to the command center, but distractedly do the next job and return to the toys. I don't mind the mix-n-match style of chores except that I have to keep on them about the list. Which I do. Mostly.

And finally, we were done. It was time to go to the pool, and the three of us headed outside with our towels and sunscreen in hand. I mentioned that yes, with their work, they had earned the promised allowance. (I'm doing a pay for work system here, with a weekly pay out. I admire the philosophy behind keeping allowance and work separate, and have thought through lots of combinations, but for my children - this summer - jobs for allowance feels right. Most jobs are worth a dime a day, though some "jobs" entail many tasks and are still worth a dime, i.e. Clear the playroom floor.)

Graham had been "saving" for some poptropica credits, so that he could buy a Medusa suit for his character. $2.50, and he had finally earned that.

As we were getting buckled in, Graham said, "Mom, you're the best!"

"Because you're getting your poptropica credits?" I asked somewhat suspiciously.

"No," he paused. It's obvious that I am the best for this very reason. "No, you're the best because you know what makes me happy."

Well, that's nice, I thought.

"I want to do something for you," he added sweetly, in that delightfully loving mood of his that somewhat unpredictably shows up. "Oh, I have it! You can go to DQ this afternoon and get whatever you want!"

"Are you paying?" I asked him.

"Me?" he blurted with a start.

"Well, are you paying for my DQ treat as a way to do something nice?"

"No, Mom. Don't you see? I'm telling you that you can go to DQ and get whatever you want, and that's my gift to you. You deserve it!" Then he kissed my elbow.

I just had to give him a big hug and laugh while we drove to the pool. And hey, he's opened up a whole field of gift giving for me. Just imagine Christmas - "Courtney, I want you to go to Hobby Lobby and get all the craft supplies you've ever dreamed of owning. On your tab, of course. You deserve it!"